The other day I was watching a Ted Talk about parenting taboos and the things that parents hide and lie about to the public because of the social convention that you can’t ever say anything bad about having kids. (Watch it at the bottom of this post.) Very interesting video and somewhat eye-opening for a non-parent, but what caught my attention had nothing to do with their actual subject theme.
A few random facts they had about miscarriages: 15%-20% of pregnancies end in miscarriage and that 74% of women say that miscarriage was “partly their fault”.
Now, I know probably a hundred or more women who have had babies, but can only think of one who has ever had a miscarriage. For comparison I know several who have had abortions. So this leads me to believe, that if their statistic is correct (and I checked other sources that say the same thing), then there truly is this deep taboo against talking about miscarriages. Granted, I’m not exactly the kind of person that a woman is going to come to to talk about that kind of thing, but still, it seems extreme.
Another thing they mentioned was how there’s no social traditions surrounding a miscarriage. There’s no funeral or standard church service or obituary or even any real acknowledgement beyond the mother and father that this was a person that was just lost from the world.
So I wonder how pro-lifers think about miscarriages and those fetuses. Do they matter as much as an aborted fetus? Now, I’ve heard the argument that it’s different because a miscarriage is not a choice, it’s an act of God, but I don’t see how that changes the actual value of the human being that is lost or why pro-lifers feel the need to fight vehemently for one, while virtually ignoring the other. At the end of the day, an accidental death causes just as much loss of life as a murder.
Now, apparantly 74% of women who have had miscarriages believe it was partly their fault. Now you can look at this scientifically and say the majority of them are simply having an emotional reaction because the medical consensus seems to be that most miscarriages are not preventable. However, I’m not talking about people of science here, I’m talking about pro-life individuals, most of whom believe God has a powerful pull over our lives, our thoughts and our feelings. So if God is the one choosing which fetuses live and which die, how do we know those mothers aren’t accurate in their feelings? How do we know they didn’t do something (or maybe the father did something) to cause God to decide they weren’t ready for a child? Is this why we don’t talk about miscarriage, because we’re afraid of that thought and don’t want anyone to think God might be punishing us?
Or is it because we don’t want to remind people that God is murdering insane numbers of babies? It kind of distracts people from the whole “God is good, God is great” thing.
Then you add the fact that a miscarriage is far more painful to the mother than an abortion, because it was something they didn’t want and I wonder even more why it is not given more attention.
Then what about that percentage of miscarriages that really are, from a scientific perspective, preventable? Do pro-lifers ever wonder what we could do to help women prevent them? What kind of things could help with that? Perhaps better maternity leave benefits so that women don’t need to be all stressed out while they’re pregnant, but which end of the political spectrum is most opposed to that?
I’m no doctor, but my first thought to prevent miscarriages is more medical attention and education for pregnant women. …and who does stuff like that? Well, Planned Parenthood for one, the very organization that the supposed baby-rescuers are most opposed to.
So basically, pro-lifers are fighting tooth and nail to save aborted babies, but aren’t bothering to give even a thought to all the miscarriages in the world.
This indicates that the pro-life position has nothing to do with protecting human life.
What does it have to do with? Well, two things. One, of course, is God. Pro-lifer’s see this issue as a chance to show their faith to God. They refuse to listen to any of the arguments about womens rights, children’s rights, overflowing orphanages, child abuse or neglect and a dangerously overpopulated planet. Instead they simply put all their faith in God so they can feel like they’re a good person in His eyes, ultimately, in hopes they will get into heaven. Numerous religious individuals admit to having no moral values beyond their desire to get into heaven every time they claim we can’t have a moral society without the concept of heaven. This blind desire to get into heaven has a massive affect on their political opinions, trumping science, logic and compassion.
The other reason to be pro-life is because it’s an inspiring, passionate position that brings out powerful emotions from everyone involved. It’s a fight for life, and it’s a fun fight. It offers the chance to see true evil, the kind from the movies, and the opportunity to get out there and scream “Baby Killer!” and have a true enemy that you love to hate. It’s a hatred that can be shared with like-minded people, to give that sense of teamwork within a crusade against the evils of the world, but without requiring anyone to do any real work to help people. In other words, it’s the love of the fight that ultimately drives the pro-life perspective.
This is the Ted Talk that got me thinking about all this. It’s interesting and worth watching, but really has nothing to do with anything I just wrote.