Cops on Ice

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The ground was covered in snow and the roads in ice one morning at 11:45 AM around 2005. I didn’t like driving in this weather because we only had snow once every couple years. Normally I would simply walk everywhere during this kind of weather, but today I needed to get a couple videos back to Blockbuster before noon.

I turned onto the main road and slowly headed out toward the strip mall a couple miles away. Immediately a police car pulled up behind me and began following dangerously close. I was driving at about half the speed limit, but still felt that there was so much ice on the road I wouldn’t be able to stop if someone stepped out in front of me, so I continued at the same pace.

As I drove on, I saw the officer becoming more and more agitated in my rear-view mirror. He would look to the other lane frequently, as though considering passing me, and as the minutes passed, his car came steadily closer to mine until I couldn’t see his bumper in my mirror. I wanted to pull over and let him pass, but I was afraid he would hit me if I put my breaks on and that I would get stuck in the snow if I tried to pull off the road, so I simply continued on at the same speed, assuming he would flip his lights on if it was a real emergency.

Then I thought, wouldn’t it be funny if he was going to the same place and is all agitated because he thinks he won’t get his videos back on time. “Chill Dude!” I shouted. “We’ve got fifteen minutes till noon!” I laughed, but the idea passed quickly.

However, several minutes later when I arrived at the strip mall, the cop was still following me. I pulled into the parking lot and took a right to find a parking space. I could have pulled directly up to the curb in front of Blockbuster, but I never did, perhaps worrying that I’d wind up getting in someone’s way.

The officer, however, drove past me and did just that: pulled up to the Blockbuster curb and hopped out.

As I walked toward the movie store with my three DVDs in hand, I watched the officer, also with three DVDs, march quickly to the slot and drop them in. He returned to his car as I started crossing the road, and I noticed that I would be passing immediately behind him to make a straight line to the drop box. I also noticed the K-9 decals on the side of the car. Fortunately today I wasn’t carrying anything illegal, but even so, my fears and imagination run wild when I’m around cops.

Then I thought, wouldn’t it be funny if he ran me over?

I didn’t take the idea seriously, of course, so I passed immediately behind the car just as I heard the engine start up. However, the thought was on my mind, so when the car lurched backward and the bumper connected with my knee, I was ready for it. My hands slapped down on the top of the trunk and I leaned forward, thinking I could jump up onto the car to avoid being run over. Instead, the ground was so icy that my feet simply slid backwards and I was able to remain standing, letting the vehicle push me backward about a foot.

In the back seat, the dog popped into view, cocking his head at me.

Then the car came to a sudden stop and I turned to continue on my way to the drop box. The driver’s door opened and the officer popped his head out. “Hey! Are you okay? Sorry about that. You just kinda came out of nowhere there buddy.”


Here’s my short little blog post about this story.

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