24 – Dealing With Cops

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The main thing to keep in mind with cops, is that they are deceitful liars. They go through training to learn how to deceive and manipulate people. If you read Marijuana Law, as I think you should, it will state that it is illegal for cops to lie while in uniform. While this is true, I should remind you that it’s also illegal for us to sell pot.

When I was arrested, I attempted to argue the morality of the issue with my arresting officer, and debate legalization. He laughed at me, saying he knew perfectly well that what he did was wrong. “Right and wrong is irrelevant to police officers,” he told me point blank. “We couldn’t do our jobs if we cared about morals. All that matters is legal and illegal.”

And this statement seems to hold true with all of my experiences with police. Any person who could make a career out of taking freedom away from other human beings couldn’t have any sort of concept of right and wrong.

What cops understand is power, fear, and revenge. Understand that and you’ll have an easier time dealing with them. Let them feel powerful, answer their questions to the best of your ability (or at least make it seem like you are), let them use their fear tactics but don’t allow yourself to appear intimidated. If you don’t act scared they won’t think you’ve done anything. But if you say something to piss them off they’ll come down on you hard, perhaps searching you illegally just to watch you go through the aggravation.

So if a cop approaches you, and you’re carrying drugs, don’t do anything to piss per off. Don’t try to run, either, unless you are absolutely, %100 certain that you can get away. Obviously don’t call the cop names. Keep your emotions under control. Show the officer respect, no matter how much you despise per. Don’t be afraid to kiss some ass either. If you can find a legitimate thing to compliment the officer on, do it. Just be subtle about it.

Very often, when an officer approaches you, pe’s interested in something completely unrelated to you. Pe’ll want to know if you saw some shady looking character, for example. So don’t let yourself get paranoid just because a cop’s talking to you. Answer per questions quickly, but try not to get anyone else in trouble, even if you don’t know them. That’s just bad karma.

Remember that after you have answered the initial questions of the police officer, pe has no right to hold you any longer. Police are trained to manipulate and intimidate people into thinking they are legally obligated to stick around until the officer has sorted things out. An officer can detain you for questioning without arresting you for only a short time, but must have legal precedent to do so. Basically if pe doesn’t arrest you, you should be free to go, and as long as you show somehow that you understand that right, there’s not much a cop can legally do. Again, be nice about it and have a good reason why you need to leave.

I’ve read on HighTimes.com and other sites that discuss talking to cops and they all have pre-printed messages they tell you to say to the officer, but many of them sound so rehearsed, like you had been practicing for just such an encounter. I believe many marijuana publications don’t take into account the need to act natural with a police officer.

One suggestion for acting natural around a cop is to keep one thing in mind: you have done absolutely nothing morally wrong. The police officer is someone who takes away other people’s freedom and threatens them with guns for a career. You sell a plant that grows from the ground and promote freedom. On a moral level, you’re in two different worlds. If you believe in hell, then keep in mind that out of the two of you, it is the officer that will surely burn there. (I don’t really believe in hell, and think all humans have good in their hearts, but it’s a belief system that can bring confidence.)

Occasionally, though, a cop will just look at your eyes and know that there’s something suspicious about you. Pe’ll start asking questions about where you came from and where you’re going. If you’re coming from your supplier’s house, make up a good lie (hopefully you’ve planned ahead). Or you can also avoid per questions by asking counter-questions, or politely mention that you’re in a hurry. The only thing you’re legally required to do is identify yourself, and if you’re in your car, show proof of registration, but cops usually come down hard on people who refuse to answer any questions whatsoever. I usually like to carry my driver’s license with me wherever I go, because cops seem to be less suspicious of people who don’t hesitate to show their ID.

After the cop has asked some questions to get you rattled, Pe might ask to search your car, backpack or person. Pe might ask in any of a multitude of ways, but what you must always remember, is to always say no, no matter what. Be nice about it, of course.

This seems to be the single biggest mistake people make. Somehow cops have a way of manipulating things and deceiving people into consenting to a search. So I feel I should spend some extra time on this subject, by giving a couple examples.

First, a fictional example:

A cop has you pulled over, already checked your license/registration and hasn’t decided whether or not to give you a ticket for forgetting to use your turn signal.

Cop: “I need to have a look in your vehicle, okay? Can you step out of the car please?”

You: “Why do you want to look in my car? Have I done something wrong, officer?”

Cop: “It smells like marijuana.”

You: “I can’t smell anything.”

Cop: “I really need to have a look. Step out of the car please.”

(I’m not sure whether or not a cop can order you out of your car without probable cause, but I recommend not arguing about it, either way).

Cop: “I can make this easy on you if you just tell me where the ganja is.”

You: “Sorry, I don’t know what you’re talking about. I really can’t let you look in my car. My girlfriend and I have personal items in there.”

Cop: “I really need to. I won’t look at your personal items. That kind of stuff means nothing to me.”

You: “Sorry, I really can’t. I have… embarrassing things in there. My girlfriend would be humiliated just knowing you looked in there. I’m really sorry to make things difficult for you, but we’re just really easily embarrassed.”

Cop: “Look, son, I know what you’re hiding in there. Just give me the pot and I’ll dispose of it. I won’t arrest you, I promise.”

You: “I’m really sorry, sir, but I just don’t have what you’re looking for. I’m sorry to disappoint you.”

Cop: “You look like the kind of guy who smokes some reefer… I’ve smoked a few bowls myself… don’t tell the captain… you smoke pot, don’t you?”

You: “I may have had a few hits in the past. I’m not a saint or anything. But not anytime recently.”

Cop: “When was the last time you smoked?”

You: “Quite a while ago.”

Cop: “About twenty minutes ago?”

You: “No. Not in a long time.”

Cop: “Then why can I smell it?”

You: “I can’t smell anything. Maybe you’re imagining it.”

Cop: “All right, don’t play this with me. It’s pretty obvious to me that you’ve got some weed in there, now if you don’t want to do this the easy way and let me dispose of your marijuana without arresting you, then I’ll get on my radio and get a search warrant, and we can do this the hard way.”

You: “Like I said, I’m really sorry but I just can’t consent to a search, and I don’t have what you’re looking for. If you want to get a search warrant, that’s fine. At least then I’ll be able to tell my girlfriend that I had no choice.”

Things might go on like this, back and forth for ten minutes or longer. Just be patient, reasonable and polite. If they can avoid it, cops will not tell a direct lie, but will usually resort to it when necessary. Never believe a cop if pe says, “Just hand over the weed and I won’t arrest you. I just need to dispose of it.” In fact, NEVER believe anything they say. Police use all sorts of trickery, intimidation, compliments, and lies to get you to consent to a search, admit that you have something, or to turn in a friend, so the best policy is to assume that everything that comes out of an officer’s mouth is meant to deceive you. If at any point the officer starts searching, say, “Sir, I do not consent to this search,” and make certain the officer hears you, repeating it several times if necessary, until the cop acknowledges what you’ve said. If the officer continues searching against your will and finds something, you might wind up having a bad night, but in the end, there will be a good chance that you could get the case thrown out of court for illegal search.

I was once pulled over on my bicycle for not having a light. The cop was suspicious of my backpack and my all-black clothing. I was so nervous, my knees were trembling noticeably. The officer asked me why I was shaking and I told him it was the cold. He told me he was suspicious that I was breaking into cars, that a dark guy with a backpack on a bicycle is the stereotypical car-stereo thief. I pulled off my backpack and tossed it lightly in the air to show that there was nothing as heavy as a car-stereo, but he insisted on seeing more. At that time, I was so nervous and didn’t know what to do, so I let him get a good look, first in the bottom pocket, then in the top two pockets, while holding my backpack myself to make sure he didn’t overstep his bounds, but when I came to the fourth pocket, where I kept my weed, I only gave him a half-second peek. He knew I had pot in there, but had no definite evidence, but at least now I had made him comfortable that I wasn’t a real criminal, carrying a gun or something. We entered into a debate much like the example I just gave you, and I used the line about having embarrassing photographs in that pocket (of course, you don’t even need to be that specific, just saying “personal items” for example, is fine). He didn’t believe me for a second, but it didn’t matter, because I stuck to it, and because I never changed my story, he had no evidence. He called backup patrol cars to park nearby to intimidate me more, but I still refused to let the officer see that last little part of my backpack.

However, it was risky for me to let the cop search me at all. I wanted to make him feel comfortable that I was not a stereo thief or carrying a gun, but it was still a gamble—for example if there had been some shake on the bottom of my pack or a pipe somewhere that I’d forgotten about, things could have been bad.

In the end, my patience, politeness, and knowledge of my rights paid off and he let me go, even though he was well-aware that I had marijuana in my backpack and that I was stoned.

Another time I was walking home at 3:00 AM, half drunk, from a Halloween party. Again, I was wearing dark clothing and carrying my backpack, and had a small amount of weed in the second pocket. A cop car pulled up about two car lengths behind me as I walked on the sidewalk, shining the spotlight on me. I looked over my shoulder, but kept walking. The car then followed me at walking pace, about two car-lengths behind me for several blocks, shining the spotlight on me the whole time. I glanced over my shoulder freely, as a perfectly innocent person would still be quite confused and possibly offended by something like that.

Finally the cop shouted out the window, “Hey guy! Hey guy! Stop.”

I stopped and he got out and walked toward me, then his facial expression changed and he whipped out his gun and pointed it at me. “Put your hands on your head,” he shouted. “Now!” I did this, and he shouted, “Throw your backpack on the ground, out here, in the grass, between the road and the sidewalk. Now don’t move.” He spoke into his radio, “I think I’ve got him. This is him.”

“Who are you?” he asked me.

“My name’s Kalin.”

“What are you doing here?”

“I’m just walking home from a party.”

“Do you have ID?”


“Is it in your backpack?”

“Yes,” I said. “I’ll let you look in the front pocket, the small one. That’s where my wallet is.” And I watched him closely to make sure he only looked in the pocket that I’d given him permission to look in. (This is one very good reason to keep your identification strictly separated from your weed.)

Meanwhile, other cop cars were showing up, and another officer was pacing back and forth on the corner of the street, watching me, holding what looked like an Uzi, but was probably some kind of stun-gun designed to look scary.

The officer pulled my license out of my wallet. “Kalin,” he said into his radio. “Are we looking for a Kalin?… No? Are you sure… Kalin Ring-vist? Okay.” He lowered his gun, tossed my wallet and ID onto my backpack, and said to me, “Okay, you can go. You’re not the guy we’re looking for.”

When you run into a situation like that, don’t expect the cops to apologize, because they won’t. Just get the hell away from the situation as fast as you can without looking guilty of something.

I know a few people who have claimed to understand their rights and seemed quite confident that they wouldn’t let a police officer push them around, but when it came down to the actual situation, they did something stupid, like consent to a search or call the officer a dumbass. Police have a way of manipulating the conversation and manipulating your words to trick you into consenting to something. Emotions are running high when you run into a cop, and they know how to play off that. The best advice is to keep your mouth shut. Be as nice as possible, especially if the cop is an asshole, but stand firm on your rights.

The following I copied word for word from a card that a friend carries in his wallet. You might want to print this for yourself, and don’t be afraid to whip it out, if you need to, during a police encounter, but whatever you do, don’t try to make the officer feel stupid. They hate that. Even if you think you’re in the clear, cops are not above lying to the courts to convict someone that pisses them off.


The Beginner's Guide to Marijuana Distribution
by Kalin Ringkvist.
download PDF


1 - The Decision To Start Dealing
2 - Finding a Supplier
3 - Trust
4 - Weed on the Front
5 - Finding Customers
6 - Ethics in Drug Dealing
7 - Honesty and Lies
8 - Doctoring your product
9 - Judging Weed
10 - Necessary Equipment
11- Phones, Cell Phones and Pagers
12 - Guns
13 - bicycles
14 - clothing
15 - automobiles
16 - Dealing From Your Home
17 - Weights, Measurements, Prices and Mathematics
18 - The Ideal Customer
19 - To Front or Not to Front
20 - Growing Your Business
21 - Keeping Your Mouth Shut
22 - Avoiding Rip-Offs
23 - Carrying and Hiding Your Weed
24 - Dealing With Cops
25 - Your rights and the police
26 - If They Search Your Home
27 - If You Get Arrested
28 - Spotting a Narc or Undercover Cop
29 - Awareness of People and Surroundings
30 - Managing Paranoia
31 - Managing your Money
32 - Managing Your Smoking Habits
33 - Managing Your Time
33 - Dating and Drug Dealing
34 - Women in Drug Dealing
35 - Other Drugs
36 - Parties and Concerts
37 - Dealing Drugs Supports Terrorism?
38 - How to Roll a Sack
39 - Summary and Important Points

Please don't blindly assume my advice will be right for everyone. If you find this book anywhere else on the internet, know that it has been plagiarized. I'm not mad though. Thanks for reading. Thanks for supporting personal freedom.

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KalinBooks.com is the ramblings of Kalin Ringkvist, a science fiction author with a passion for peace and freedom.